Image…

…wherever you go, you’re bombarded with images of what the media deems is “beautiful.”  You have to be this tall, this shape, wear this brand, have this hairstyle.  Of course, this is generally more of a female issue, but males struggle with it, too… especially me.  I’m not that tall, I’m Asian (and not the exotic-looking kind), I’m somewhat stocky, not in the best shape (although I’m stronger than I look… apparently).  That latter part, however, can be changed… I mean, I could work out, eat healthier… sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t… so that’s my fault.  Nevertheless, I can’t help but compare myself to other guys… it’s especially hard being a dancer.  When I auditioned for So You Think You Can Dance Canada, all the guys I went up with were tall, lengthy, lean / muscular, good-looking… and then there’s me.  I can’t jump, turn, or kick like they can, so I used the floor.  I figured I’m closer to the floor than they are, so I might as well use it.  Good thing my strength is in choreography… at least that field isn’t so much about how you look… right?

I guess this is the reason why I have so many clothes… I hide behind them.  And I’ve actually gotten quite good at hiding myself beneath my clothes.  When I’m feeling especially “unsightly,” I put together an outfit that has enough layers in it to create a structure that masks my shape (or lack thereof… do guys have a shape?).  When I can’t layer, I become very conscious… hence why I’m not so fond of summer.

So, believe it or not, I’ve made a decision to go and buy that 10-Minute-Trainer by Tony Horton (same guy who created P90X… google it).  We’ll see where this takes me.  I’m really gonna have to commit to this if I want results… much like how I committed to my dancing.  So hopefully this is a new start for me… I can’t change my face, height, build… but I can make myself look the best that I can with what I’m given and how I was created.

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Other musings…

• Why can’t people understand “walk left, stand right?”  Have mercy…
• I will be subbing for Tara Jean’s Jazz 1/2 class at Harbor Dance on Dec 9 and 12.  I’m kinda scared… I have some pretty big shoes to fill!  If you haven’t seen her work, YouTube it… or Facebook… she is simply amazing!
• Wintergroove this Saturday at Massey Theatre.  PraiseTEAM Sr. Showcase will be performing Lovin’ The 80′s and I will be performing my Beatles contemp piece with my FG contemp group… the one and only time it will be performed.  How sad.

• I can’t believe it’s December already!  My my my, the time sure has flown.  I love Christmas =)

That’s all for now, Imaginary Reader.

Exit, stage left…

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